Guide to dealing with BWOINKs

So this guide is coming from someone who has been Bwoinked twice in his entire “career” and was able to get off with one minor note, BUT I think that is well enough to be antiquated with the infamous Bwoink.

So what should you do in case you get Bwoinked.

  1. Ask before you do something that might result in a Bwoink. This will save you from sticky situations it is always better to ask before diving in. Now if you did do a bad on accident or you believe you didn’t do it in malicious intent be prepared for the Bwoink and don’t let that scary ass sound get to you. But if you did do it with malicious intent I got nothing for you.

2a. When the Bwoink comes comply to the Bwoinking Admin. Be nice, be calm, and admit to your wrong doing.

2b. Be nice. Do not insult or swear at the admin who Bwoinked you or the players involved. Doing this will make you look guilty and an asshole. Use your manners and formal “speak” when talking to an admin. This will make you look more professional and trustworthy. Improving your odds of not getting banned.

2c. Be calm. If you can control and calm yourself while talking to the admin you can keep a clear head and be better at explaining your situation. Improving your odds.

2d. Admit to your wrong doing. Admitting your wrong doing even if you feel like you don’t need to can be a MAJOR difference between a ban and a note. Admitting to your deed and explaining the thought process and reasoning behind your actions. Doing this can make you look honest and that you have integrity improving your odds of getting a less severe punishment.

  1. After it is all done reflect on the action/s that lead to your Bwoink even if you don’t get in trouble. Good places to do this is at is the Bans page or Ban Appeals page. You will learn a lot from the mistakes of others and how their thought process reflect their actions and personality. Trust me I do.

In the end Rule 1 Don’t be a dick.

funny joke guide, now here’s the real one

How to show them mods who the real boss is when they BWOINK you for spacing clown:

  1. Insult them immediately, never take them seriously

Assert your dominance as the big man here, what power do they really have over you anyway? This will make them reflect on whether or not this bwoink is even worth it, and if they’re a good little bitch mod, they’ll realize it isn’t. But if they don’t…

  1. Threaten them with demotion

Say something along the lines of “Stupid fucking admin shitter if you don’t shut up I’ll call Qwerty did you know he’s my dad and that he loves me very much yeah that’s right you little bitch you’re scared yeah go back to momma” with absolutely no punctuation or line breaks. Never mention DDoSing though, that’s a dick move. The sheer power of your statement should overload the admin’s robot brain and give you time to perform step 3:

  1. Pull up completely unrelated screenshots from some discord conversation you had with the “victim”, put it on a shady media sharing website, and link it to the admin in order to attack their character.

Admemes, being the horny ERPers they are, will likely click on the first porn ad they see and seek out their credit card to enter their info. In the meantime, this gives you time to initiate the final step:

  1. Use whitepages.com to find the admin’s personal address, full name, and face. Use this information to create a rubber mask of their face and deepfake-esque voice changer to make your prepubescent voice resemble their own. Go to Best Buy and purchase a burner cell phone, all the while wearing the face mask and using their information. Call a politician in their area and make a bomb threat, clearly stating the admin’s address and full name. Within a matter of minutes the admin will be arrested. Next, contact the owner of the shady website and purchase the information which the admin entered into the computer, using their password (some variation of 1234abcd) to log into their Discord account. Make a call to the highest ranking admin currently online, still with the mask and voice modulator. Tell them that you are a great player who contributes positively to the server consistently and deserves to be made admin immediately.

Congratulations, you are now permabanned!

2 Likes

Ngl but the whole “ADMIT YOUR WRONGDOING AND YOU MAY DODGE A BAN” makes it look like admins have an ego that they must get daily strokes or else ya get banned.

Dunno if any of our admin is like that, but e h

Though I’ll admit that being a snarky arse will result in admins laughing at ya or worse.

Just be direct, explain the situation and understand that ya broke a rule if it turns out that you did. Rule lawyering discussions are tiring.
If ya wanna discuss about the rule ya supposedly broke, it’s great as long as it’s a civile discussion rather than a “ACTUALLY YOU’RE WRONG” type of argument. That applies to both admin and bwoinked player.

For the admit and you could dodge a ban I’m thinking along the lines of if you don’t admit and start lying you will dig a deeper hole and get in more trouble than you if just tell the truth. Sorry if I made it sound like that I was calling you guys out I was typing this up my entire school hour. My apologies.

And lying wont usually work because admins have access to the most op tool in all of ss13: Za logs

Nah mate,'s alright. Didn’t mean ya make us sound like that, just that context is easy to shove all over the place. Though I liked the way ya expressed yourself/the guide-ish.

The guide was not a bad read ngl.

When the Bwoink comes comply to the Bwoinking Admin. Be nice, be calm, and admit to your wrong doing.

Yeah, except I have had many instances where the admin bwoinking was in the wrong. And one hilarious time where one admin and I argued back and forth only to get a bwoink reading “Oh shit you’re right” Let’s also not forget some of the absurd bans we see occur.

For example that I have one of the most absurd bans of previously by Doge because a cultist blew himself up with his friends because somehow as AI in the round that is somehow my fault for a cultist acting foolishly with a bomb that I have no control over. Oh and look how long he lasted as a admin here.

Fuck off with this absurd idea that the admins are always right. I stand my ground every single time and not one ban has ever stuck against me because I know I am right and refuse to falsely incriminate myself for their little male power trips.

First off, take a chill pill. Second of all, yeah. Mistakes in bwoinks happen. If we accuse you of something you actually didnt do, tell us!

  • When you adminhelp do not say things like ‘is it valid?’ or ‘IM BEIN GRIFFED’, give details of what is happening and ideally who is doing it, job and character name.

  • If you see someone doing something that seems out of line adminhelp right then, do not wait until round end to see if they are a traitor then adminhelp next round. It makes it a lot harder to deal with.

  • Avoid lying or being aggressive in PMs, unhelpful or insulting to admins, lying while being questioned over an incident will cause you to receive a longer ban and being consistently insulting or aggressive will get you muted.

Thank you for the feed back dork.

Thank you for bringing up good points as to what to do when ahelping.

Zoey I’m not saying that all admins are gods that we must obey. I’m saying that even if you feel that your actions are justified you should still comply and talk it out UNLESS you did it with clearly malicious intent. Also Zoey with all due respect you got to cut it out with the all men are bad regime. You got to understand that not all men are bad and the boogeyman in the closet. That lots of men are good people who make honest mistakes. While I’m not saying we are saints I’m saying that not every transgressions are against women.