Name Guidance: Human Edition (Or: How to not sound like 5 dozen other Joneses)

In light of many, MANY issues with naming policy, I came to mess stuff up and talk :sparkles: names :sparkles:

Specifically human names here, I can cover other species by request.

So first you need a first name, something that doesn’t raise an eyebrow. Something that isn’t ‘Bark’ or ‘Dingleberries’. “But Yoshi!” I hear you say, “Those are such unique interesting names, how else do I stand out from the crowd?”

ok maybe you didn’t say that but bear with me.

A name can come from anywhere, it doesn’t have to be English in origin, in fact many names aren’t! Dylan is a Welsh name, specifically the name to a Pagan Welsh god of the ocean. Ludwig is a German name, Logan is actually a Scottish name, et cetera, et cetera. If you’re in a pinch you can always use sites like Nameberry to pick out interesting names!

And as for last names? There’s the usual ‘Jones’ or ‘Jackson’, maybe ‘Williams’, but a little dive on the internet can get you so, so many more! There’s:

  • Patronymic names, these are used by Oozelings too, the ones that are like the aforementioned ‘Jackson’ (son of Jack), or Jameson (son of James), or Henriksen (son of Henrik)
  • Job names, Fletcher (someone who makes arrows), Smith (blacksmiths), Mason (stonemasons), and stuff like that, there’s a decent list on Wikipedia! Category:Occupational surnames - Wikipedia
  • Location last names, these came most likely before patronymic ones, where there weren’t as many people and you could be, say, “George from Ashton”, over time though towns would have grown to make these last names moot, as there could be many Georges in Ashton.

You can mix and match to your liking, and find the perfect name to use!

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i feel like bark and dingleberry was a blow at me specifically

I would like to point out my main character is Taylor Fisher so I can in fact give my characters names that aren’t Dingleberry Shitfart or Bark Frungus

I mean Bark and Dingleberry are good examples of unacceptable names by the naming convention. As for Taylor, yes, it’s a very acceptable name and actually has a kinda nice ring to it. :smiley:

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most of my (even hrp) character names are litterly random sounds that sound like semi-weird names

remember it’s like 500 years in the future and humanity has gone into several different planets so MANY new cultures must have at least started to form


Don’t name yourself anything with Jimmy. There’s already like 5 of us.


i will now be jimmy fisher, out of spite


I feel targeted, how dare you sully the Jones like this