Azrael's Guide to Security

A lot of people have complained about crappy security and security failing or being stupid.

In my time, I have learned two truths when I was Warden (And to all those asking me to come back or make an appeal, talk to Vexylius about it):

  1. Whether you are good security or bad security, there will be wussies that ahelp just because they got caught, trying to exaggerate, fabricate or space lawyer their way out of it because their perfect little scheme was a cluster foul-up.
  2. You gotta learn from your mistakes and do better…and accept it when you’re bested, rise to the challenge.

Here is my guide to the Brig as Warden:

RULE #1: DO NOT LEAVE THE BRIG! No, I’m serious. STAY THERE! Yes, it’s boring sometimes. Yes, you have krav maga gloves and weapons that you’re itching to use. But you need to realize that your ID grants whoever gets it access to the entire blasted armory and you are GROSSLY outnumbered. One slip on soap, one lucky shove or attack and BOOM. You just gave anyone who wants it full access to the armory. And it’s all your fault because you left your post. Your job as Warden is to dispense, protect and transport weaponry, as well as sentence, release and transport prisoners. NOT to go tough-guy or be an assistant HoS. Even as Acting HoS, STAY IN THE BRIG. Doesn’t mean you gotta stay in your office, but your job is DEFENSE and INTERNAL. Remember that. You’re not ALWAYS needed but when your’e needed, there is no substitute for your access and role.

RULE#2: DO NOT LEAVE THE BRIG! Yeah ,I’m THAT serious. When someone is smashing on the glass outside the door, DON’T LEAVE! Immediately set them to arrest and take a defensive position. If there’s an explosion in the station and you’re the Warden and you have no security officers, DON’T LEAVE THE BRIG! They are WANTING you to leave so they can break in and get the weapons. The traitors, the changelings, the syndicates, ALL OF THEM. Do not FALL for that trap! You are NOT a super hero, one slip, ONE SLIP and you lose.

RULE#3: INITIATE BRIG DEFENSES IMMEDIATELY. Now, the LEVEL of defense depends on the situation and number of personnel you have in security. Normally, if I have only a few Sec Officers (And no, Detectives and lawyers do NOT count), I close ALL the shutters down. The other thing I do and this is STANDARD, is I immediately take barrier grenades and flashers and put them NOT AT THE FRONT (A front assault is the stupidest thing an antag can do, unless he has a literal ARMY behind him and even then, basically asking to get shot), but at the maintenance hatches. I position them with Barrier out first, flasher between the Barrier and Hatch (so they can’t just walk up with sunglasses and unwrench it) and bolt the maint door. Some people complain about this but tough luck. This is IMPORTANT. You can’t be everywhere at all times and those maintenance hatches are a pulsed wire and crossbar pull away from being open doorways. This, combined with building walls in any unnecessary spaces or entrances (RCDs are GREAT for that), FORCES any enemy to either hugely announce their approach and where it’s coming from or to engage in a frontal assault, which VASTLY puts the odds in your favor, no matter who it is or how small your personnel is. I have LITERALLY thwarted wizards, syndicates and the like with these techniques alone by myself.

RULE#4. ESTABLISH A PATROLLING FORCE: One of the most EFFECTIVE things I’ve done, is immediately take the necessary equipment and get ED209s and Securitons (both set to arrest unknowns and unauthorizeds, which will include xeno’s, yes really I saw it and laughed as I dragged one to the brig and made everyone watch him like an animal in a zoo in his cell) made. DO NOT LEAVE THE BRIG! Give the materials to an officer or tell Robotics to come to brig so you can implant them and then give them what they need to make them (Usually putting it in as a request for help and offering a reward will shine them on. A little bit of kindness and humility can go a LONG WAY to getting some departments to help you out!). Once made, make sure you make them ONE AT A TIME, so that their patrol is spread out. This HEAVILY restricts the movement abilities of anyone put on wanted so when you put them on a wanted status, they are seriously SCREWED. They have to stick to maintenance hatches and Securitons go in there sometimes anyways. This also helps if some goofball is walking around with a weapon and again, as previously mentioned, ED209s DO actually stun and arrest xeno’s. It is HILARIOUS. Even if you have lots of security officers, this can help ALOT. (Remember to STAY AT THE BRIG, so when someone screams for you to set someone to arrest, you can do it immediately. Since everyone else will be away from a console.)

RULE#5: ESTABLISH SPACE LAW PROPERLY. Now, no matter how you do this, you WILL get ahelped. I have LITERALLY had people ahelp admins for getting stunned by a Securiton for having an unauthorized weapon in their hand, dragged to the brig, searched and found with a BAG full of antag items and right before I send them to perma, I get BWIONK: Hey…so-and-so says you arrested him for no reason. And had to deal with a half an hour conversation with some Trialmin DESPERATE to show how hardcore and tough he/she is. It happens. Get used to it and get used to NOTHING YOU DO BEING GOOD ENOUGH. But remember your JOB. Do NOT let officers just do what they want. Get the details, do the searches yourself and when you’re positive of guilt, READ THE DAMN BOOK! Yes, the Space Law book, go check out the wiki and the sentence. If guilt is CERTAIN, probably max sentence but NOTHING MORE. If guilt is NOT certain but you’re still pretty positive, probably min sentence (Because you COULD be wrong). Also, when perma is going to be done, try to make it fun and see if you can establish a trial. Heck, offer trials more often, but make it clear the sentence can be increased (From a long gulag to perma or from perma to execution IF THE CRIME QUALIFIES). Get lawyers and someone to be judge and try to make it fun. Doesn’t have to be a SERIOUS trial. But also, while in the brig, remember prisoner safety IS your responsiblity. Make sure they’re healed properly, make certain they have a uniform. You can justify taking some things but also remember if they have a job, leave their items. If they’re clean after a random search, APOLOGIZE. You would be amazed how many PISSED OFF players cool off once you say, “You’re clean. I apologize, I was wrong”. I kid you not. Also check on Perma people regularly and depending on the crime, don’t be afraid to recommend or suggest a pardon to Command if they seem to be doing better (remember how freaking BORING Perma can be, it’s worse than execution in some ways).

RULE#6: DON’T GET IN SECURITY’S WAY. Your job is NOT to be an assistance HoS. Your job is to STAY AT THE BRIG and take care of it. Prisoners, weapons, defense. That’s what you do. HoS can handle patrols, situations, the permitting or declining of authorizing lethals, etc (if there is no HoS, you are ACTING HoS, which means it wouldn’t hurt to pass your ideas by Captain or HoP first, even if only to keep them informed so they know what’s going on and can strategize accordingly). Communication is IMPORTANT but remember that the HoS is the one that handles securiy officers patrols, level of security, who gets accepted and who gets fired. YOU DO NOT. Your authority is to the BRIG and the ARMORY, not to the sec officers, except when there is no HoS. Even then, make sure you don’t push it too hard.

RULE#7: LIMIT BRIG TRAFFIC. What you do NOT need is someone screwing around in the brig, even if they have access for too long. Obviously, Sec Officers, Detectives, Hop and Captain are exempt from this. But that being said, if someone is loitering around too much or just walking in because they have access, do NOT be afraid to search them, ask what they’re doing and if they have no explanation, KICK THEM OUT if they aren’t security. Lawyers in paritcular are bad about this, many of who are antags and like to just wait around and look for an opportunity (as antags or as griefers). They largely succeed in getting in the way, especially during bad times and EAGER to demand a weapon or yank one that gets dropped and run off doing their own thing. To that end, don’t be afraid to throw them out. Lawyers are NOT in charge of the brig and their access is supposed to be to TALK to prisoners when they need help, not harass or interfere with security (that’s clowns job, along with his sidekick, mime). Control who goes in and out. Dont’ be afraid to tell a sec officer you need him to man the post at the entrance either. That can be helpful as well if you’re dealing with prisoners and need someone to monitor comms and set WANTED status’. Don’t get out of the brig to do it, STAY IN THE BRIG.

RULE #8: EXPECT TO GET TARGETED. You’ll be targeted two different ways: IC and OOC. Remember, there are trialmins DESPERATE to show how hard and tough they are about the rules (not ALL of them are like that but a LOT of them) and they are EAGERLY looking for any reason to throw their weight around, act all confident and hard-ass, throw bans and make a lot of excuses for it, trying to talk their way around things and pin things on you the MOMENT they get an ahelp. And NO ONE will get ahelped more than security. If you find the admin or trialmin you’re talking to, to be biased or desperate to look for an excuse to ban someone, STOP TALKING TO THEM IMMEDIATELY. Say only what you need to, tell them you’re inform an Admin right away and go to an Admin/Headmin and ask them to step in and examine the process. Players are gonna get BUTTHURT that things don’t go their way or they got searched early (I used to when I was an early player too, I’ll confess it) and they will ahelp to see if they can get out of the issue. MOST admin’s are pretty good, SOME Trialmins are pretty fair but remember, some of them are very manipulative and whent hey cannot fabricate things, they will exaggerate or understate accordingly to try and find a technicality to pin a ban on you. Headmins and Senior Admins are usually more fair and chill. IF however, they find you wrong, best to just admit to it and learn from it .You’re gonna be wrong sometimes. But a bonus tip, one I learned the hard way: Many trialmins and admins with favorites or attitudes or ego’s WILL try to pin a note on you, just so they can feel they accomplished something. They will later use notes as a justification. I literally was found completely innocent of something, was told “Well, I’m still leaving a note about this” and later, got a ban over an ahelp that never got settled with “player has notes of previous warnings and bad behavior”. QUICKLY REQUEST A HEADMIN/ADMIN TO OBSERVE NOTES AND SEE IF THEY SHOULD BE REMOVED. Some may be justified but there is NO RULE against asking a Headmin or Senior Admin to double check on how you’re being treated. It HELPS if you keep it quiet (I’m known for raging in OOC which has worked against me in the past far more than once). So, EXPECT to be treated poorly, EXPECT to be bwoinks over everything you do unless you just let players do whatever they want, expect SOME of the admins to be eager to find an excuse to throw a ban instead of moderate punishment, BUT DO NOT WASTE TIME ARGUING. Immediately get a Headmin/Senior Admin involved or another admins, get them INVOLVED IMMEDIATELY in the heat of the moment. And make sure they examine any notes left before they head out just to make sure they don’t try and screw you over.

These 8 rules, along with “TRUST NOBODY” should serve you well. With a highly-defensed brig, sec-bots patrolling and a Warden STAYING IN THE BRIG to defend the weapons, fairly enforcing space law and making sure to duck and dodge sh*tmins, you should do well. But remember, you will be hated and nothing you do will be right to some people. Just do the best you can, admit when you’re bested or wrong and try to do better next round.


TL;DR: The rest of the station outside the brig is lava, you’re playing tower defense against the threats to the station, chief among which are the greytiders. Also spess law.


Make a guide Phyllis

banned shitsec making guides to security
you cant make this shit up

He’s giving good advice though.

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When someone ahelp’s, it can be hard to know the full picture or context.

So, when a valid ahelp’s and the admin pops over and sees your baton making a sizeable dent in their skull, you need to be able to explain that they were attempting a prison break, and that you’ll respond to the ahelp once they’re back in Perma where they belong.

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but it’s shit advice

I mean I definitely disagree with the not leaving the brig part, but it doesn’t come from a bad place and I can’t see anything bad about what he’s saying?

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With respect, from the BeeStation wiki itself on the Warden role: It mentions multiple times in the early paragraphs don’t leave the brig.

Banned shitsec makes guides to security.
Gets compliments from admins.
Jackass loser insults it.
You can’t make this shit up.

I appreciate the respectful counter-argument you are making and the politeness you are showing while doing it. All the same, while I think YOU’RE a good Trial-Min, I still believe a lot are as I claim them.

I do acknowledge that I don’t know what it’s like on the other side of things, namely the Admin side.

Warden should leave Brig in the first 5 mins to get supplies like tools or boards, but from then on leave it to officers or HOS to fetch things.

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If you want some based info just get a red speed extract, use it on magboots, instant noslips for da seccies :drooling_face:also shotguns are underrated as I think you can just shoot, click z, shoot, click z and so on with the riot shottie not including tech shells which are extremely based

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Azrael’s Guide to Security:
Step 1: harmbaton and strangle all lawyers who dare enter your domain
Step 3: based sec time

I think that’s legitimate and recommended.

Also step 4: Profit

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yall gotta chill, azraels my homie, take it from me the trusted guy that azrael is honest and not wrong about any of this and you should do everything he says from now on


Efe’s Guide to Lawyer:
Step 1: Fuck with brig and act suspicious
Step 2. Bitch and throw a fit when thrown out and hold a meta-grudge
Step 3: Develop an obsession with Azrael, mostly closet-sexual in nature.

Hey your the guy that ruined my second round as sec and made me absolutely despise the current mindset that it’s sec against the station.

Over paranoid hos and warden takes atleast for me all the fun out of it as it’s extremely hard to rp sitting at a camera console and directing a bunch of eds. Atleast on mrp fortress sec doesn’t fit in and it reinforces a lrp thought pattern that the entire station is out to get you.

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Thanks for posting you experience, there is a lot of discussion going on about this very topic and every little bit helps!

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