AMA about EPS' mail delivery services

never had the chance to send off mail with EPS? now you get the chance to ask anything that crosses your mind about the terms of service and how it can aid you in whatever it is that you are doing on the station
you DID send mail with EPS? I’m happy for you or sorry it happened. any complaints, suggestions related to mail delivery, or data collected without consent will be considered in order to improve future deliveries


Can I send Cargo bounties through EPS? Would this include mechs and combat mechs? Small Gygax joy rides included.

Do you use the request console? Can Cargo assistance even be requested?

Would you want to basically be relied on to assist in fetching things for others? For example if I’d want the spare iron in EVA.

Finally… how do I send mail? Robotics always start with that wrapper thing, but I never used it. Can I send mail to coworkers? OH! Can I send mail to the AI? :Ɗ


I believe bounties are just like other mail
I mean, what good would have the training been if it were unable to generalize
now can EPS pilot a mech? well, I mean, has it not piloted shuttles before? I don’t see a difference

hm, I have never checked the cargo supply requests, like those done via the terminals in the walls, like the ones that allow you to call sec or engineering, but maybe I should make a habit out of it
I remember that a geneticist once placed a request for monkey cube boxes but I don’t remember if it was a console or wall terminal

I technically prefer to deliver concrete “mail” (anything) from a part to another, so if it already exists, then it’s good
if I have to go through the cargo supply orders… well I could try but I don’t have as much knowledge of cargo supply orders as an actual cargo technician
tl;dr: consider EPS a quirky mulebot for public use

EPS accepts close to anything as mail, even if not packaged
that means items work, bags work, crates work, lockers work, although it becomes increasingly harder to guarantee that they arrive to destination untampered by others
… some people even wanted themselves delivered as a way of figuring out where a specific place is (i. e. glowstation medbay), basically relying on EPS as a bootleg taxi
the only exceptions to things EPS can deliver are apparent contraband and dangerous items, maybe non-consenting people as well…

with a loophole: when packaged in any form, even those included above, as to conceal their dangerous nature or otherwise, EPS won’t check contents as to not violate mail privacy
unless mail is taken by a warranted sec, I guess


I should also probably mention
deliveries made on crew’s behalf are not a problem, but a priority

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Yes you can, and you can specify the priority of it and include a message.

I’d love to see you working together with the Clown in a Clown car.

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that settles it then!
make sure to specify that it has to be brought by EPS and that should be prone to catch my eyes


Request Assistance

how does this even work

Try it out! I am not home anymore to try it out.

seems to send messages between supply consoles
but it seems weird at same time
genetics one on delta is also named medbay storage
some consoles can only be sent messages as a reply

and worst of all
when looking at Request Supplies, I only saw Hydroponics

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It is severely unused. Perhaps due for an update?

now I remember my local server is one month behind in updates
I should have updated first
I will try again sometime soon and update post if there actually are changes to that


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Since EPS’s behavior is very robotic… is he confused by paradoxes? Could someone with a fear of EPS ward him off by yelling “THIS SENTENCE IS FALSE!” at 'em?


EPS responds refreshingly well to commands so it wouldn’t surprise me if this was the case!

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What if he gets a mail which is titled “This isn’t mail”? lol

Jokes aside, I’d doubt computer would be so confused by 'em as TV and games make 'em out to be.

unless it’s related to a task, EPS times out pretty quickly from trying to decipher paradoxes

if they don’t have mail, it shouldn’t be difficult to ward off EPS, it will literally comply

but, if they do...

like the majority of things EPS delivers? I imagine that the mail doesn’t have a word in it, but who sends it
unless it’s a living, sentient person that literally screams for help
for good measure, make sure to wrap it up somehow and it will be fine
EPS won’t violate mail privacy


The real question is, what if EPS has to deliver mail to “Robert); DROP TABLE Mail;–” (little Bobby Tables we call him)?


what the name EPS stands for?


have we learnt nothing about sanitizing input in 500 years?

EPS is Epsilon truncated to 3 characters, to match IPC naming standards
I chose that greek E to stand for Engineering, because EPS was originally meant to be a mostly random character for learning engineering, in a series of other IPC characters with similar naming convention to explore other roles as well

but if you insist for it to be a mail based acronym, I’d go for Express Post Service, I guess?

how things diverged from that plan, I think that’s a story I already mentioned somewhere but can’t remember exactly where

lately I’ve been trying to play engineering and other roles anyway, so if you saw ETA engineering intern, that’s kind of how EPS was originally intended to be